The Minds Labyrinth

So I crashed. Slept for a good 2? hours. Now I'm awake and so tired that my hair hurts. That's about all I have energy to type.

My heart feels like it's going to boom. The thump thump is thump thumping =D. Baby is up, husband is up. I'm making meat pies. Not Mrs Lovitt's meat pies. Dandie Lyon's meat pie emporium! =D. Who wants one? I had something REALLY worth reading to say, I think, but I sincerely forgot what it was. Probably that I'm not tired and I can see sounds. Yeah. That was most definitely probably it. I swear I've only had coffee. I look wonderful with no sleep. I'm rocking it. B-e-a-utiful <3. Husband says I need to lay off the coffee. Blasphemy, Also my brother said Harry Potter isn't real and that broke my heart and now I'm sad.

It's currently 7:41am where I am and I haven't slept yet. I've been up all night and my body is exhausted but it's decided that self sabotage last night was a great plan and to just not sleep. Why not sleep now that you're sure that you'll pass out as soon as your head hits the pillow? Because I have a doctors appointment at 9:40am and seriously what's the point in less than 2 hours of sleep? So like any good blogger I'm going to document my day, when I can, for you lovelies. Because you're all awesome and I love you <3. Currently I am really flapping hyper and jittery and wide awake and sleepy and jesusfuckingchristbrainslowthefuckdown. Baby is asleep, husband is asleep and I just had a bath with pure cold water because my landlords are normal humans and they're waking up for work and used it all. So I'm fucking cold and my hair is drippy and this coffee is probably twice as strong as I'm supposed to make it so let's start t

For those of you that are still here, that still read every post and look forward to new ones, thank you so much. To those of you that are new here, welcome. I'm sorry for the lack of posts. It's been a rough time for me and it's hard to remember that there's this website to post on. The thing is life is kicking my ass. I'm a mother that can't look after her son because I'm constantly sick and that puts a huge damper on parenting. I'm a writer struggling with writers block. It's like my creativity is trapped in a box and it can't get out. I'm a human that is struggling with the idea of my life being frail, the realization that I'm not immortal. The truth of the matter is I'm stuck. Stuck in a storm cloud feeling lost and alone and afraid, feeling confused and trying so hard to get out. I've been lost for months now. It's not easy feeling like every direction is more blackness and no matter where you turn you can't find